I start college on Monday.
Yup. You read me correctly. I’m going back to college.
And yes, I am scared out of my mind.
If you don’t recall I started this blog in January/February 2014. One month after I left college. I was sad, confused, lonely, and scared. Going to that school was the absolute worst experience I’ve ever had. I’m scared to death to fall into that mental state again.
I think I was numb. In lack of a better example; it’s like I’m a recovering drug addict, I’ve been in recovery for a while, and I’m terrified to relapse. Except instead of drugs, its depression and I’m scared that going back to school might be my trigger to relapse.
Except one very important thing is very different.
I am not that girl anymore. I am happy and social. Unfortunately, I am still confused about almost everything in life. And don’t get me wrong, I’m still scared. But I’ve learned that just because I’m afraid doesn’t mean I get to chicken out. I have to be bold and I can’t let fear stop me.
So, here I go. Wide-eyed, ready, and trembling in my boots.
Wish me luck, It’s my first day of college part 2!