My Great Grandmother’s Diaries

So a few days ago my grandmother told my mom that she found her mothers diaries from the 1950’s. She then proceeded to tell my mother that she was just going to burn them because they probably didn’t have much to say.

My mother wasn’t going to let her grandmother’s history be erased so quickly. So, my mom and I went to my grandmother’s house today and snuck the diaries out of the house.

We couldn’t let something so precious be demolished.

My great grandma wrote in her journal every day for years. I am glued to these diaries. And yeah, my grandma may have been right, there isn’t much said in the diaries, but that’s beside the point.

She talks about ironing and washing often. She goes to play bridge. One day she bought a cabbage. So, yeah, not a lot of huge events are happening. However, the joy and excitement I have while reading these make the stories feel like she was a Hollywood star or something.

My great grandma mentions her mother a lot. A lady I’ve heard about for years. My great-great grandmother passed long before I was born, but she has always been a lady I feel connected to. Afterall, I am named after her.

Hearing about what her mother was like, and learning about what my great grandma was like is so exciting to me.

My mother loved her grandma, and I am so happy that my mom will forever have these diaries to hold onto. They tell the story about before she was born, and if you know my mom’s family, you know that that’s quite the story.

I’ve decided that I’m going to start journaling too. I want to leave something behind for my kids, or their kids, and maybe even their kids. Maybe someday my grandkids and great grandkids will want to know what their grandmother was like at 22 years old…

… now that I’m thinking about it…

I’m going to have to hide these diaries for a long time, they don’t need to know all my secrets while I’m alive. 🙂

Maybe I’ll write my diaries addressed to them.

I’ll have to write a disclaimer in advanced.

“Warning: Your grandmother had her fun in her youth, do not think any less of her now that you know her secrets, she’s still the angel you’ve always thought of her as.”

I’m just kidding, I’m not that bad whatsoever. All they’ll be reading about is how I went to school and work.



School is going well! My lowest grade is a 95%


One Week Later

It’s been a sad week, guys.

It’s been a great week, guys.

Yes, I cried my fair share of tears this week. They’re justified tears though. Although I’m a firm believer that tears never need to be justified. If you need to cry, then you cry, honey.

Anyways, my tears were for my grandma. When you lose one of the main people in your circle, it would be bizarre not to mourn them.

But, it has been a great week nonetheless.

First off, I made a friend. A real one! One that has a physical form, and can converse back with me. I know, guys! I’m shocked too. Seriously, I got invited to a party this weekend. It’s a legit friendship. I’ve known this friend for a while, but we just decided to actually start hanging out.

I also start working full time next week, I thought I was going to start in June! So that was a pleasant surprise. I’m thankful.

How good can life get right now, guys?

Of course I miss my grandma. I’m still at the stage where I’m forgetting she’s gone. I even told myself I was going to go visit her tomorrow. I forgot I couldn’t.

I’m always going to miss my grandma, she was wonderful, I wish you could’ve met her too.

I know she’s not going to see this, but I just had to let her know that I’m okay.

Life isn’t going to be the same without her.

But life is great because I had her.

I love you, grandma.

Everybody misses you, but everybody’s fine.


I’m just going to say it; I got scared to blog. I hadn’t blogged in a while and because of that I got nervous to blog again. Does this happen to you guys? I hope I’m not the only one who does this. It’s almost like a bad relationship… on again, off again, on again, off again…

But if you’ve ever read any of my previous posts, you would know that apparently I’m good at on again and off again relationships.

That was me making fun of myself… and no this is not me saying I got back together with my awful ex.

I told you guys I was done, and I meant it.


I’ve done a lot of growing in this past year. I think thats what you’re supposed to do when you’re 21.

Life is supposed to be a constant whirl wind… and thats what it’s been.


Brace yourself for all this:

So since January this is all that has happened: I quit my job, I moved back into my parents house, I got a new job (the same day I moved), met a boy, got my heart broken by that boy, moved on, had too much fun with friends, got refocused on my goals, had more too much fun with my friends, and my dearly loved, and admired great grandmother passed away.


My next blog post will be about my life, however; this post is a letter to her.

Hi Grandma,

I’m going to state the obvious… I miss you.

I’d pay lots of money to hear you laugh one more time. Although you’d tell me not to spend my money on something like that.

Grandma, you were a good one to me. You always accepted me for who I was, and you always cheered me on for who I am becoming. You and I became close at a fairly sad and confusing time in my life. (The exact same time I started this blog)

Of course I loved you long before two years ago. I have countless memories of you when I was little. However from middle school through high school I wasn’t around as much, and that’s my fault. If I could go back in time and tell myself one thing it would be to spend more time with you.

I love the memories I have of you growing up, they’re special to me. It’s just that the past two and a half years really rocked with you consistently in my life. I discovered a lot about myself with your help… you probably never even realized it. I want to thank you for teaching me how to be strong-willed, and not to let people take advantage of my niceness.

A few days ago a guy was being rather rude to me. Normally I’d be the pathetic girl who would let him be mean, and then try to make it better again. Not this time. The very first thing that went through my head was, “my grandma would hate that I was letting someone be mean to me… she’d be so upset.” So I didn’t stand for it for one more second, and out the door the potential of that relationship went.

Thank you, Grandma. Thank you for helping me realize I deserve people being kind to me, and that I am a strong woman.

Grandma, I’m going to miss you for a long while. I was hoping I had found “the one” before you passed. But you help me find myself before you passed, and thats more important.

I’m so thankful you were in my life. I’m so thankful that you’re going to continue to be in my life. My strong-willed, humorous, thoughtful, personality are characteristics of you. That is how you are going to live on to me. You gave me pieces of you, and I am thankful.

I love you, Grandma. I miss you. I’ll talk to you soon.